Seeing your loved one live with dementia can be heartbreaking. Taking care of them is more saddening. It can be extremely difficult. It is an experience that requires immense compassion and understanding.
Your patience levels will have to increase, and you will have to be even more open-minded than you already were. Why? Because you’ll literally be walking with someone for probably the rest of their lives, with little time for your own journey (unless you’re extra deliberate about your life).
That’s right. It is tough.
Top of the many challenges you will face when caring for someone with dementia is getting them to see a doctor, either for initial diagnosis or recurrent health checks.
In this article, you will learn practical guides to help you navigate this tedious process. You will feel supported and prepared while ensuring that your loved one receives the quality medical attention they need.
Whether newly diagnosed or not, someone living with dementia must see a doctor. It has many benefits. Unfortunately, this is something many dementia patients shy away from doing. It could be due to many reasons.
Below are a few reasons why seeing a doctor is a must for dementia patients;
These visits to the doctor aren’t solely for treatments. They’re also for monitoring and evaluation. There are signs you can miss that their doctor will spot. This is how you watch out for your loved one.
One visit can open your eyes to many things you’d normally miss. It is an avenue for patients to ask the doctors questions regarding confusing aspects of their care. You will have the chance to raise valid concerns and get insights on confusing things.
Dementia is progressive. And it affects the memory, thinking, and behaviour of an individual. However, early detection can make a huge difference in how it is managed. Regular check-ups also have significant impacts. It ensures timely access to quality care.
However, early diagnosis of dementia is just about saying an individual has dementia. It goes beyond that. It is an indication for better planning and ensuring easy access to therapy and other interventions that can improve the condition of the individual.
Some other ailments may present as symptoms of dementia. However, the chances of having that as a diagnosis are reduced by regular visits to a doctor.
Vitamin deficiency, thyroid imbalance and various infections sometimes present as dementia symptoms. You, the carer, spot these and immediately start treating these symptoms as part of the dementia, when they could be an underlying symptom of something else.
However, regular health checks can identify these problems and suggest how to correctly manage them. Regular check-ups also make it easy for healthcare professionals to track the level of dementia progression.
Imagine a scenario where there is a change in your loved one’s health condition, but not their medication.
Dangerous, right?
Regular hospital visits can prevent that from happening.
Regularly honouring medical appointments provides a chance for the doctor to review medications. Change is constant. And with changes comes a slight change in medication.
This also makes it possible for the care professional to suggest key areas of improvement. Like diet, community engagement, social interaction, physical activities, and so on.
It is common for people with dementia to refuse medical help. They are often fond of resisting visits to the doctor. The resistance can be emotional, physical, and even cognitive in some cases. In this section, we examine some of the reasons that influence the resistance.
Fear is one of the most common contributors to resistance. The prospect of seeing a doctor causes intense anxiety in patients. For one, they may be afraid of what the doctor might say.
The uncertainty also revolves around what test might be done. Will something painful happen? And so on.
Someone who has previously experienced a painful or frightening medical encounter will have reservations about seeing a doctor.
Previous unpleasant moments may have a lasting effect on people. They would not want to go through the same horrible process.
This particular reason is why you should never dismiss your loved one’s refusal to visit a doctor. You need to max out your patience levels here so you can “see” what they’re struggling to say, and help them find the words that they will use to express their fear. This way, you can quell the resistance, and they’ll be more malleable.
Most importantly, you’ll get to learn more about the doctor and their methods, and decide if your loved one should stop seeing them.
Dementia primarily causes confusion, as memory and cognitive processing are affected. Where your loved one has little supervision, they can be confused about why they need the appointment in the first place.
If they do not remember experiencing any problem, then they will definitely find it hard to understand the need to visit a doctor. Constant persuasion might make them see it as being forced into doing something unnecessary.
The side effects of this are that there would be arguments and resistance further become solidified.
Physical impairment can also contribute to a dementia patient refusing to see the doctor. Cases of limited mobility or chronic pain at the slightest movement may make it hard for a patient to get to the clinic or hospital without help.
Some patients’ discomfort might also come from being in a clinical environment. Seeing unfamiliar faces, bright lights, and so on can influence discomfort or disorientation.
It can be hard to accept some things. Like something being wrong with your memory. What many of these patients do not understand is that it is normal to be embarrassed about dementia, but wrong to refuse a doctor’s visit.
Imagine repeating the same speech over and over or finding it difficult to handle basic tasks.
Hard, right?
The embarrassment can be second to none. It is hard to admit such to a doctor. In severe cases, the patient might start to think they are a failure.
That is why many victims deny the symptoms. This denial creates a barrier to seeking help.
Living with dementia is difficult. Dementia can make adults think they do not have control over their lives. Some individuals do not have adequate knowledge about their condition. Hence, being taken to appointments without a full grasp of the situation may feel discouraging and disempowering.
When a person feels like that, they may withdraw or act with outright refusal. Offering clear explanations and involving them in the whole planning process will be helpful. It can go a long way in reducing the feeling of powerlessness.
Now that you understand the reasons for the resistance, you need to strategise their support plan. Carers and families play the most crucial role here.
As a carer, your level of professionalism is needed. You need to know how to do the right thing at the right time. They need your companionship.
For families, your loved one needs your presence. Your approach and preparation can ease their anxiety. It can also reduce their resistance. Below are some key things you need to do to make their doctor’s visit a pleasant experience.
You need to plan ahead. It is not just about the how, but when. Visitation to the doctor should not be impromptu. Planning ahead gives room to sort out a lot of things that could hinder a pleasant visit.
For a start, pick a day and time when you notice your loved one is mostly calm and alert. For most people living with dementia, this period falls in the early hours of the morning and afternoon.
Avoid booking appointments when they are often tired or restless, like late evenings or during their mealtimes.
If it is your first appointment, endeavour to visit the clinic in advance. Checking pictures of the place online is a perfect alternative to this. Doing this creates a sense of familiarity.
Do not bombard someone with dementia with too much detail. This does not mean you should hoard details as well. You do not have to dig deeply into the reason the appointment is necessary.
This will help to keep your loved ones safe. This reduces the risk of triggering fear or denial. It also helps to keep your loved one feeling safe and cared for.
You cannot do it alone. Get additional help and support. A familiar face or an additional helper can help ease the tension. It could be another family member or a close friend. You can also contact SupportNetwork for a care worker who specialises in this aspect to offer comfort.
Having this extra person can also help you with physical activities like driving, managing paperwork, navigating the clinic, and so on, while you focus on your loved one’s emotional well-being.
Assurance goes a long way. Communicate with them in a gentle tone. Encourage facial expressions. It will go a long way, influencing how your loved ones feel about you.
Speak gently. Ensure they are comfortable. Rub their back, hold their hands, give them gentle taps on the slack, etc. Use reassuring phrases like ‘You are not alone.”, “Let me know whenever you need me.”
They may eventually not remember the details you shared with them, but they will feel the emotional assurance. And that will help them feel safe and calm.
Their cognitive impairment should be a reason for them to be excluded. Engage them. Let them also make decisions.
Let your loved one be involved in the planning of the visit. It should not meet them unaware. Let them choose what to wear. They can even be the ones to pack their bags with snacks, water, and other comfort items. Giving them these small decisions to make gives them a sense of belonging. It also reinforces a sense of control and dignity in them.
A comfort kit is a form of distraction. It should contain something that can soothe and entertain them. It could be a scarf, a small photo album, or a familiar snack. These personal items can act as distractions when waiting for the doctor or during delays. A comfort kit can help you reduce stress. Check your stash for old clothes.
How you dress and the type of clothes you wear matter. Dress comfortably. Pack an extra pair of clothing in case the clinic gets cold.
Preparations like this will go a long way in ensuring your loved ones are comfortable throughout the process.
Visuals can help ease confusion. For instance, showing a picture of the doctor, the clinic, or even past appointments can spark recognition and reduce anxiety.
If your loved ones respond well to written prompts, you can try to write a short note like “Today, we are going to see the doctor, and everything will be okay”. Then, place it somewhere they can see it.
Being consistent with these little acts and mild repetition can offer grounding when memory feels uncertain.
Rushing can create a sense of urgency, which can cause panic or frustration. You want to take things slow. Leave home early. That way, you will not have to be in a hurry. You will also have time for breaks and pauses.
Being relaxed helps your loved one feel more secure. If things do not go as planned, don’t be flustered. Relax and try to adapt gently. Staying calm yourself can help them stay calm too.
Ensuring they stay right on course throughout the visit is no small feat. Hence, after the appointment, acknowledge their effort. No matter how small, appreciate them. It starts with something as small as saying a simple “thank you” or “You did great today”.
You can also treat them to their favourite, to reinforce the experience on a positive note. This gentle incentive creates a chance for future cooperation and nurtures trust.
At the end of the day, you might want to self-reflect on how the day unfolded. Everyone is different, and what works once may not work the next time. Take note of what helped. What triggered distress during the visit?
Use these insights to make changes to your subsequent appointments. If you are working with service providers who provide care professionals like Support Network, you can share your observations with them. They may offer new insights that could help you.
These strategies are a hack. And adopting them will make clinic visitation seamless. Above all, they will help to prevent anxiety and reduce the rate of resistance in people living with dementia.
After tackling the problem of resistance, the next thing is to ensure the appointment itself is not stressful. There are steps you can take before, during, and after the appointment to ease the anxiety and ensure things run smoothly.
Dementia is best delivered through a team approach. You cannot do it alone. You need to involve a service provider like SupportNetwork. These service providers will provide you with essential health workers who will help your loved one get better.
Some of the people you need on the healthcare team include specialists, support workers, and allied health professionals
Caring for your loved one is important. However, it should not hinder you from taking adequate rest. Your loved one needs care, but it should not be at the expense of your health.
Taking care of someone with dementia is emotionally disturbing and mentally draining. From managing daily tasks, medication reminders, timely appointments, and so on, you need to take care of yourself, too.
Hence, it is essential to seek help and build a network that supports you and your loved one.
Support Network is one of such networks. Support Network offers a range of services that are tailored to specifically meet the needs of families whose loved one is suffering from dementia. They provide in-home care and respite services.
Their team understands the pressure faced by carers and works closely with you to ensure they pair you with compassionate and experienced support workers. This also comes with additional resources like care coordination, therapy referrals, and community engagement activities.
You are not alone on this journey. Support Network is there with you, every step of the way.